Falling in love

Hello hello! It's been a while once again. Hehe...I must admit, I'm not very committed to this blog. But I felt a need to talk about something today...so here I am!


LOVE. I've read about, watched it, dreamed about it and thought about it. It's always been a fantasy of mine: the happiness, the heartbreak, the complication. I know about it all....well, in theory anyways. But well...I've never ever thought it would ever happen to me. To others, of course! But to myself...not really. And then suddenly...


BAM! 


I'm in a situation where there is someone I like who likes me back and I'm beginning to experience things that I've only ever read/watch/dreamed about. And honestly, I thought it would be thrilling and fun and and and well...romantic. But all I feel right now is confused and in turmoil. 

I mean sure, I feel the lightheadedness you get when you feel in love; the rapidly beating heart; the blush; the warmth; the joy...and the list goes on. And it's a wonderful feeling, don't get me wrong. I've never felt anything like it before and I really do like him so much. But at the same time I feel the sadness; the jealousy; the confusion and the overthinking mind that all girls get. Trust me, I've read so many romance stories and watched so many romance films to recognise it. And I hate it! I don't want to be that overly jealous girl who is so selfish that she won't even let the guy she likes so much as talk to another girl. I can't remember how many times I have sat angry in front of the computer/tv when reading/watching a romantic story/film, thinking how stupid and selfish the girl is. And yet, here I am, feeling those feelings. I hate that I feel so out of control. One minute I'm on cloud nine, the next minute I'm feeling upset. It's so crazy!


Sigh....hopefully I'll be able to sort out what I'm feeling and just...well, let it flow and hope for the best. 


¬Aurora