Moody

I swear...i don't understand myself at all.

Today was the day...what a whirlwind it has been for me.

It started with my alarm ringing...i had set it at 9:00. Of course, me being the lazy bum i am, turned it off and changed it to 9:30, only to once again, ignore it :) Ended up waking up at like 10 and just lay in bed for a while...thinking: 'Rae's leaving today'

Eventually i managed to drag myself out of bed and got ready to go out. On Tuesdays, at Video Ezy, Weekly videos are only $1 and i had planned a while back to just have a small movie marathon...just me. I'd rent some romance movies and buy some ice cream, grab a blanket and settle in my living room for a fun, relaxing day. What? Haha..i heard it's really good for when you are down :) according to all the romance stories i read anyways...

And i had promised Lucy to go ahead with my plan, coz i was having doubts...i mean, who has fun when their friend is leaving for another country on that very day. So i went out to wait for the bus with my grandma...only to realise we had missed it. We walked all the way to a bus stop with a bench where we waited for a while. I then decided i wanted to do some exercise before i pigged out so excused myself from my grandma and started my trek to Hurstville. (I saw this pretty cute looking guy at the bus stop place but ignored him ;))

Anyways...i arrived at Video Ezy after an...uneventful walk. It was a little awkward looking for videos by myself...i felt very self conscious. But managed to pick out 4 dvds: Step Up 2: The Streets, P.S. I Love You, Love and Other Disasters and Notting Hill. The guy at the counter probably thought i was a total weirdo..haha

Then i went to Coles and bought myself an expensive tube of ice cream. Sara Lee: Chocolate and Caramel Swirl...something like that.

I then had to wait for the bus home. I met Michelle...very unexpectedly. Had a quick chat...as well as advertised Video Ezy :D

Anyways, i managed to get home safe and sound. I was very excited! I couldn't keep the smile off my face ^^

So i ended up watching all 4 movies...if the first bit of Notting Hill counts...it died on me halfway through :(. I ate leftover pizza from yesturday and was able to eat ice cream out of the tube :) (Usually i would get scolded by my grandma for doing that but thank god she wasn't home then :D)

Sigh...it was very relaxing and i enjoyed all the movies :D But unfortunately...for having siblings and no house to myself, i kept getting interrupted or i could hear people talking...not very fun but it was fine...i suppose. P.S. I Love You was absolutely sweet as :) and sad as well. I know many people say that movies made from books are really bad. But i actually liked both, the movie and the book. Both took on different interpretations and headed in different directions in terms of what things they wanted to express but both were excellent :). Haha...i'm starting to sound like one of the analysing weirdos.

After a relaxing day..i started to get...moody. I dunno, i just lost my smile and just dragged myself round with a closed off face. After dinner, i sat myself down and just continued the puzzle i has started yesturday. I was very moody and didn't answer much when people talked to me.

I just don't understand how i can go from being so happy and merry to sad and depressed in such a small time frame. It's like...happy in the morning but depressed in the evening..or as soon as it gets dark. It's so stupid. I wanna be happy and carefree again. I miss that side of me. I dunno when, but it just disappeared and i am having a hard time trying to find it again. It comes out sometimes, but it doesn't last and i just don't understand what is wrong.

Sigh...i should just stop thinking too much about things shouldn't i?